crochet, and doctor stuff.

First, Hubby is employed! He starts the first job of his new career at 6 a.m. Monday morning! Whee! He's pretty wiped from the stress; we're both terrifically relieved that he has a job with a reasonable hourly rate, and a promise of a review and a raise after 30 days. I'm very proud of him; he's worked really hard in school and then in job hunting to make this possible.

I've just finished up the chemo caps and thongs for my friend. We have piccies, but I want to wait until she sees it first. Finally, I'm crocheting enough to warrant recording it!

I splurged and stopped at Barnes and Noble and picked up Crochet! Magazine today. I've gotten a few pages in, and am definitely enjoying it. I do need to re-up with the Crochet Guild of America again when our wallets ease up. I'm really enjoying crocheting again, after nearly a year off. It feels good to be making things again. I'm working on some market bags and a capelet for my daughter -- the market bags are easy, so I'm working on them for fun and on her capelet for beauty.

This is roughly the 3 month (plus a little) anniversary monthiversary(?) of my mastectomy, and thus I have seen the surgeon and the oncologist. I've skipped a month's menses, but as long as I'm not having odd bleeding, that isn't an issue. And I'm at that certain age anyway. The addition of the Tamoxifen has increased the severity of my hot flashes, which is good, according to the onco. It may well be involved in the irregularity of my menses, too. I did go through some PMS type stuff a couple of weeks ago -- got really hungry and craving chocolate, but it went away without, erm, issue.

The onco poked and prodded me in various places, including a clinical breast exam on the remaining one, and felt lots of different lymph node locations. He told me everything looked good. The surgeon didn't examine me this time, but plans to in three months, when I will also see the oncologist again. After that, I think it goes down to every six months for both doctors. The plan is for me to have my next mammogram next April, on schedule, and six months after that have an MRI. If the surgeon has her way, I guess I'll be going in alternating every six months for a mammogram and an MRI; if my size stays down where I am or less, that won't be a major issue, though lying on a table with holes cut in it for my breasts to hang through for a good picture is far from a comfortable position.

The surgeon, after checking me over, started to leave, then stopped. She said something like "I really appreciate your positive attitude. You haven't let this stop you or change what you are doing." A bit confused, I said, "Well, the chair really changed more of what I was doing. You told me I was disease free, so I didn't change much after I healed." She replied, "Oh, you are. But you continue to go forward, and plan, and go out and get things done. That's a nice change for me to see from a lot of my patients."

That surprised me; I'm not inclined to think of myself as Little Miss Sunshine. (Although Catherine once called me Pollyanna. A long time ago.) But she was quite definite that my cheerfulness was a welcome relief. I went home and talked to the husband, and his reaction was "Think about who she must deal with every day. It sounds like a lot of them have given up." Most of her patients are cancer patients, but with all the stuff I'd read about a positive attitude helping (although there are studies that say it doesn't really -- it still makes life more pleasant than moping) I didn't expect to be such a shining example, I guess. Plus, I'm told that this incident, while increasing my risk of recurrence, has not itself shortened my life. That feels like a gift, for sure.

So maybe I should become a motivational speaker. Wonder how you do that, and if there is some kind of an agency like a modeling agency for such a thing. That I could probably do for a living, as it's within my limitations.

I also finally pulled together the documentation on my cancer diagnosis and surgery to send to my disability attorney. In addition to that sheaf of papers, I added a form that Health and Human Services asked for from my doctor attesting that I was in fact permanently disabled and not able to work (or stand). I'm hoping against the odds that form might actually circumvent the hearing process and get me administrative adjudication, but I'm not holding my breath for it. On the other hand, this form should be sufficient for me to get my ID as a disabled passenger from the bus company. No one argues when I pay the discount fare from my chair, but the rules do say I need to have that ID -- and now I have a form that they should accept. That means a trip downtown is in my future. I think I'll wait till I have a bit of cash handy so I can at least play a wee bit.